Is University Meant To Be This Bad For Me?

I know, I know I disappeared pretty much for two weeks. I can explain.  I kinda got lost doing my university course work. All because there were some missing details, like the measurement we are counting in. It could of be seconds, elephants or even Dodos. So I have spent a lot of this racking my brain to make sense of all of this. I can’t say much detail because I am meant to keep what I have done in mine so no one can copy it. So all I can say is because of this I am twoish weeks behind blogging, script writing and everything else. Even a social life… if I had one.

My university work. Is all well in good, but and this is a big one…. I think. The issue I had if that all my lectures are neurotypically inclined. If I had known that. I would have little to no chance of meeting people like me, by that I mean young ish… who understand txt speak but use it to sound cool. The idea that the best way people listen is if we speak up as one voice. I mean some of this isn’t that new, you could go back to the 1920s and find some of these. The best way I can say it is this…

Every time a meet a new classmate and get talking. I have to mention that I have autism, it’s a bit obvious in person, I twitch, tic and look like I not paying attention when I am not in their way. I have been meant with the same three responses since I signed up. They are: That’s nice, I’m Sorry or that’s Alright my X is autistic, usually daughter or sister. Notice a trend? They are all very…. British. We either try to relate or we just don’t care. What happened to just understand that people that are saying they are autistic. Just want people to understand that they need more time to process, to that they don’t understand human emotions. I mean if there is one place that may deal with people on the spectrum it would be a Psychology class. Right?

I still think some of the worse people to talk about autism is the lectures, or at least the lectures I had. I had one who didn’t care, mainly because he thought that my world view was fascinating because a lot of social norms I had to be taught- so he gets a pass. I had one compare me to another student who had schizophrenia, umm I think that’s a little out of the idea of what autism is. Then I had one that didn’t believe that my autism included not understand human emotions. So apparently the emotions were happy, sad, annoyed, and petrified all in mix verity. There was around 24 of these, I got 2. Yes laugh it up 2. They were a happy and a sad. I thought the petrified one was having a heart attack. My lecture said they were easy. Everyone but me got almost all of them in one go. I tried to explain that my brain doesn’t process these emotions and it can be hard. With that I got some of the dumbest help in all of my time in education. For one of my assignment I was meant to be talking about a journey of a person becoming a refugee, using emotions as a core. I ask what they would be feeling as I can understand it but explaining it is harder. I got told they will be scared; do you understand that? They would also be happy but scared when coming to the UK. I asked how happy and scared could be a mixed emotion. I got told it just is. So that puts me on the spot and makes me look like I should even be doing a degree.

I like doing psychology. I know my specially is something else, but it is nice to learn something new and that can be a bit more useful.  If anyone is new, my specialty is sub-molecular nuclear physics. So how heat comes out of a black hole, how the reactions work within sun to produce tri stage heat source that brings heat, light about four different times of reaction all from process. The only thing it would be good for would be understanding a nuclear power plant. The issue is knowing how dangerous radiation is at a young age kinda put me of going in one, also leaning about Chernobyl would also do that. It always make me think that should I be doing my degree if people, including the lectures could be this backwards to me. This TMA is a good point of this. In all sciences you have a table in the results section this table at least somewhere is meant to contain the measurement of whatever it is you are measuring. From µseconds (micro-seconds) to days. If you have to make an educated guess in what you are presenting because someone else left things out. Then it good to have all the facts, if you are Autistic or not surely people care about getting things right?

Anyway to make up but also, just to keep things fresh. I will also be posting about the BlackPink concert that was today, it was good. that’s all you are getting until you look at my next blog.

Please everyone stay safe, like, comment if you have something to say and share if you want,.


Published by The Autistic Gecko

I am a blogger and podcaster who is on the Autistic Spectrum. I talk about Autism, Mental Health issues and anything that I think deserve a voice.

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